A How-To Wedding Series: Wedding Officiant and Music

Wedding time again!

From the officiant uniting the Mr. & Mrs. to the music that fills the room, these are two very important aspects to consider in the planning process. Picking who to marry the happy birde and groom can be one of the toughest decisions of your life, if not the toughest! This is because of the millions of differences we each possess and visions and beliefs we each have. And the music, it sets the vibe of the moment!


The wedding planning can be smooth sailing until the officiant conversation comes into the picture. This doesn’t happen to everyone, of course. However, it can be a huge obstacle in the wedding planning process. Many couples have a church and pastor they love and want this particular pastor to marry them. Easy. For the most part, they know who this person is and what to expect. Some couples know a particular officiant or person they want. Great, but what about those couples who don’t know where to start in this area or maybe, due to religion, it’s a touchy subject or maybe, due to a destination wedding, they are looking for recommendations in the area they looking to get married. How do you find someone to marry you with exactly what you are looking for?Here are some questions to ask.

  • As a couple – what is it exactly you are looking for?
    • Are you looking for a religious ceremony?
    • Are there any sayings or bible versus that we definitely want?
    • Something basic?
    • A short ceremony?
    • A long ceremony?
    • What is your vision?
  • What kind of training do you have to be an officiant?
  • Are their any requests that you would ever turn down as an officiant?
  • How much input do we get to have in the ceremony script?
  • How would you describe your ideal ceremony?
  • What would you say is your best ceremony? Why?
  • What is your rate for the wedding?
    • Do you charge additional for coming to the rehearsal?
    • Do you like to stay for the duration of the wedding?
  • How early do you show up before the wedding?
  • Let the officiant know where you are getting married and ask if they think they will need a microphone?
  • Do you have any examples of past wedding ceremonies that you’d be able to see?
  • After meeting a particular officiant stop to think how you liked them – did you connect? Did he or she seem excited? Do you feel like you can trust them to create a special ceremony for you?

My husband and I used the pastor at the church we were attending which we loved! Being in the wedding business though and being a destination area I had the officiant conversation a lot! My very favorite officiants were those that took genuine interest in the couples they worked with and weren’t afraid to try new things since each couple is so different. They would allow the couples to take the reigns or if they were stuck the officiant could gage the couple and create something g unique for them! You’ll know the right person when you talk to them!


Music for your wedding from start to finish is so important! It sets the tone, the mood and emotions during your awesome day. You want something that is you, from the ceremony to the end of the reception. Stop and think – with the venue you booked, your personalities and the formality of your wedding do you want live music or would you like a DJ? The sky is the limit when it comes to music – there are so many different kinds. Just talk about what is “you” and go from there. Ask for recommendations from your venue, odds are they have some fantastic people they work with on a regular basis.Here are some questions to ask yourself and perspective musicians or DJ’s.

  • Ceremony
    • Are you looking for a simple song played over a speaker?
    • Are you looking for a live musician/musicians?
  • Reception?
    • Are you thinking a DJ?
    • Are you looking for live musicians?
  • For the DJ or musicians?
    • Is this your full time job? Are weddings your primary events?
    • Have you worked at <your venue> before?
      • If not, are you open to a site visit for optimal sound?
    • What equipment do you bring? Offer?
    • How do you customize the music experience for each wedding you do?
    • How do you get the crowd moving?
    • Do you take requests?
    • Why should I choose you as my wedding DJ/musicians?
    • What is your cost and what does that include?
    • How long is your typical wedding?

Myself and my sister both had DJ’s for our weddings and wouldn’t change a thing. For my walk down the aisle and cocktail hour and had a quartet with an opera singer. I wanted something so different and loved it! So, find what is “you” and I’m certain you can find something you’ll love!

I would say the most important detail of your entire wedding is your officiant – without this detail there would be no wedding! The music will be there to create ambiance, emotion and fun! Your wedding is coming together. I’ll see you back for one more post in this series and your wedding will be complete!


And I’d choose you


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3 Replies to “A How-To Wedding Series: Wedding Officiant and Music”

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